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Chapter 3, the excrement has most assuredly impacted the rotating propeller, what on earth is going to happen next?
Wonder no more, just read on to find out!
Thanks as always to my editor no1Uno who keeps my stuff legible at least. The rest is on me, especially any niggly errors that have crept through, gotta keep it real though!
We know that everyone here is over 18, these are make-believe people in a make-believe world. Don’t try this at home kids!
I’m not here to make political or moral points, or to offend anyone’s personal sensibilities. I’m just trying to tell a story and certain things have to happen in a certain way for it to be worth reading.
Saturday 14 December 2019
Maeby; she would help. She would know what to do. He dialled her number as he helped his mom out to his car.
“Maeby Lewis?” Richie realised he must have dialled her business number rather than her cell. He put the call on speaker as he was getting his mom’s seatbelt fastened.
“Maeby? It’s Richie, can we talk privately?”
“Sure honey, I’m at the office but I’m the only one here… What kinky game do you have in mind today?” Maeby was having a long, boring day catching up on paperwork and was looking forward to Richie relieving some of her tension,
“Nothing. It’s mom. And dad. It’s bad.” Richie was cranking the old Chevy; it was always a pain to get started from cold.
“What’s wrong baby?” Any hint of frivolity had left Maeby’s voice.
Finally, the old motor spluttered into life, belching out white smoke as Richie over-revved it in his anxiety to get away. He slammed the car into gear and screeched out onto the street.
“Maeby? Mom’s pregnant. She told dad and he kicked her out of the house. He said he had a vasectomy three years ago and now knew mom was cheating. When I heard some of the horrible things he called her I owned up to being the father and he kicked me out too. He even mentioned calling the cops.
“Shitttt!” Maeby hissed. “Where is Jess now?”
“Here in my car, with me. I’m heading to my dorm. I’ll try to get my roommate to stay away for a few days until we work out what to do.” Richie was realising his mom had no clothes or toiletries with her. No possessions at all, just a little white pregnancy test clutched in her left hand.
“Is she ok?” Maeby asked, worried.
“She’s kinda comatose from crying. I had to carry her to the car but she’s just staring straight ahead now,” he replied. “Hey mom, you ok? Can you hear me?” He shook her arm but she did not react. “She’s not responding to me Mae, I’m really worried.”
“Get her to your dorm. It sounds like she’s in shock perhaps. Get her to bed, shut the curtains and try to get her to sleep. Don’t leave her alone for a second. I’ll be there as soon as I can to sort out more permanent accommodation for you both.
Don’t worry Richie, it’s going to be ok. Dennis is mad, sure; but he made one crucial mistake. He told you about the vasectomy. The only reason a married man has a secret vasectomy is that he plans to stick his dick into as many different pussies as he can. Dennis has clearly been cheating on Jess long before anything we did at Christmas. That’s crucial leverage for us.
We’ll find a way out of this. For now, just stay with Jess, grab some drive-through food you can reheat later. Keep your phone with you. I’ll call you tonight.” She hung up and Richie made a left towards KFC.
Maeby’s voice had changed as she spoke, from sexy plaything to concerned aunt and sister then diamond-hard, uber-bitch lawyer; strong and clear-headed. That’s who they needed right now; Richie felt better already.
In the drive-thru queue he texted his aunt:
[R] I love you so much. Thank you for helping us, I was losing my mind. Call me later. ??????
[M] Don’t worry darling, this will all work out for the best. Love you too. ??????
He called his roommate Doug and asked when he was coming back to their dorm room.
“I’m already here man, just airing out the room, washing the sheets and stuff,” Doug said.
“Dude, I need you out of there for a couple of nights. I’ve got an emergency!” Richie said, panic rising.
“What sort of fucking emergency? You have a bad burrito? Need me to call the EPA about air pollution?” Doug always laughed at his own jokes, whether they were funny or not.
Richie thought, what the hell could he say? Then he smiled and came up with the one thing he knew Doug would never expect of him:
“No you spaz, it’s a pussy emergency. I’ve got an amazingly hot cougar in my car and she’s mine until I run out of cum. Come on Doug, I need the room for this. You’ve gotta help me out. I’ll do your laundry for a month; this is the chance of a lifetime dude. Do me a solid, please?”
“Well, illegal bahis that’s different. If you’re finally going to lose your virginity I guess I could make an exception. If she exists and it’s a very big if in my book, I’ll make myself scarce. When will you be here?” Doug asked.
“Ten minutes, she’s a little bit drunk so I’ll need your help to get her up to the room. Meet me outside, car park B. And thanks man this means a lot,” Richie was genuinely grateful, if Doug had brushed him off he didn’t know what he would have done.
Armed with a mega bucket of chicken, fries and soft drinks he hit the road again and headed towards his freshman dorm at Arizona State.
Doug was waiting as Richie’s old Lumina wheezed to a halt in car park B at Taylor Place.
“Don’t say anything, mom, just play dumb for a minute or two, then we’ll be safe in my room,” Richie whispered to her as he undid her seatbelt.
Doug seemed impressed, luckily Richie had never shown him a picture of his mom. “Nice, good call getting her drunk, she’ll not notice your micro-dick that way!”
“She’ll not notice me punching you in the face either, shithead! Now help me get her inside and upstairs.”
They draped Jessica’s arms around their shoulders and headed for the back entrance. They weren’t near an elevator this way but it was only two flights of stairs and there was no one around. Pretty soon they were outside room 317. Doug unlocked the door and pushed it open. Richie’s bed was freshly made and the boys set Jessica on it.
Doug stood there staring at her as she slumped back in the bed, barely registering their presence at all.
“You sure she’s just drunk, you haven’t gone psycho and ‘roofied’ her or something?”
“No, you dick! We were partying at her place but her fuckin’ husband came home early so we had to book. Look man thanks for helping but you’ve really gotta go; right now, please!” Richie’s voice was rising.
“Just need to get a picture,” Doug said, fishing out his phone.
“Like fuck you do!” Richie shouted. “Get the hell outta here before I really do punch you in the nose.” With that he half shoved the other boy out of the door, shouting “I’ll call you in a day or two when we’re done.” Finally, he slammed and locked the door behind him, sliding the security chain into place.
Turning he looked at his mother. She hadn’t moved from where they’d left her, half-collapsed against the wall. Richie knelt beside her and began to remove her clothes.
“Come on mom, let’s get you into bed. A good sleep is just what you need. I’ve spoken to Maeby and she’s going to help, she’ll know just what to do. Everything will be just fine, just you see. Now, arms up.” He’d removed her jeans and sweatshirt top, leaving her in a sports bra and cotton panties. She’d been barefoot, fuck they really had left in a hurry!
He levered up the edge of the bedclothes and got her in under them. As he moved to tuck her in she clutched his hand like a frightened child.
“Stay,” she whispered, the only word she’d spoken in the last hour. Richie stripped off his shorts and t-shirt and slipped naked into the twin XL bed.
He spooned in behind his mom, one arm under her head the other around her belly, pulling her tight to him.
“It’s been an awful day mom, let’s get some rest then we’ll have some dinner later.” FUCK!! The bucket of greasy chicken was still out in the car! He leapt up, threw on his shirt and shorts then stuck his feet into his sneakers and ran out of the room towards the parking bay. He made it unseen and was on his way back when he met two of his neighbours, Steve and Terry.
“Hey loser,” Terry called, “what will Coach Turner say, you on the seafood diet?”
“Yeah, if he sees food, he eats it!” laughed Steve. Richie didn’t have time for these two asshats.
“No, I’m on the serial-killer diet so you better fuck right off if you don’t want to be added to the list, assholes!” Richie spat as he ran past and back into 317. He put the chicken and drinks in the small refrigerator he and Doug shared, stripped completely and jumped back into bed. Jess hadn’t moved, she was crying again.
This time, he pulled her half on to his body so she had an arm and a leg draped over him. He had his own arms around her chest and raised her up so her face was buried in his neck. He stroked her hair and rubbed her back, whispering and crooning all the time. He almost wished he could remember a soothing lullaby to send her off to sleep.
Eventually, her body relaxed and she began to snore gently and this allowed Richie to settle down too. Suddenly he was very tired, the stress of the afternoon had taken its toll and he followed his mom into the darkness.
Richie was awakened by the insistent buzzing of his phone on the desk. He leaned over and grabbed it – Dad!
Well, they would have to talk eventually, so he answered.
“Richie, I was worried. I’ve called ten times. Where are you?” Dennis illegal bahis siteleri sounded anxious.
“We’re safe dad, together. We’re ok.” Richie was cagey. His father had been half-crazed with rage at the house, he didn’t really want him to know where they were. While thinking of that he switched to speakerphone and worked through the menus and turned off the Friend Finder function. He didn’t think Dennis would remember about it but best not take any chances.
“I’m sorry I went off the deep end like that this morning, especially with you. We need to work this out,” Dennis replied.
“No dad, we don’t. In those few seconds, mom and I saw the real you. There’s no working that out. You scared me, you terrified her! I never thought I’d say this but I don’t really want to work it out. I never knew what lurked under your mask, behind the Dennis “Super-Seller” MacFarlane facade. Now I do and I don’t like it. Don’t call either of us again. Aunt Maeby is our lawyer now; any communication should come through her.”
“Yeah, the fuckin’ bitch called me… I mean, Maeby called me, she was pretty steamed. She’s coming here, to Phoenix. She’s joining a big firm downtown. My lawyer has an office above Chen’s Chinese laundry, over on Holland Avenue. Fuck!”
“Yes, Maeby is an internationally renowned shark, your guy better put his big boy pants on for this one. I hope for your sake she leaves you with more than a pair of socks after this is all over.
The vasectomy dad, why did you do it? How could you cheat on mom, she’s perfect?”
“What do you mean, cheat? I never cheated. Your cunt of a mother is the one that cheated! It’s incest too, that’s illegal you know son. You two could go to jail,” Dennis was becoming frantic.
“If that’s the route you want to take then so be it, but if Maeby subpoenas your assistant, your travel records, I don’t know… If she sends investigators to Florida, to Seattle, to all the other places, do you think the girls there will lie for you? Perjure themselves for you?
“Mom was trying to save your marriage. She knew she’d almost lost you; she hoped a baby might bring you back to her, give you both a common goal, a reason to be married. What did you ever do? Spend half the year away doing god knows what? Screwing god knows who? Oh sure, you sent back money… Do you even know what mom spent it on? Do you?
“Absolutely fuck all is what, she saved every penny, she and I invested it so that you could retire early. Why do you think I took those business courses in school? I’m an art major for fuck’s sake, it was to help you, help our family have a better life.
“And you didn’t even care. You just needed pussy. You wanted a grubby caricature of sex, cheap and tacky when you had a Rembrandt waiting at home. I pity you, dad, you could have had it all, now I don’t think you’re going to have anything.
“Maeby will call you. We won’t. Goodbye.”
Richie hung up before his father could speak again.
His hand was shaking as he set the phone down. He was breathing hard as he lay back down on his pillow, staring at the ceiling. Wow, that had been tough!
“Where have you been all my life Mr Tough Guy?” Jessica suddenly asked in a clear calm voice from beside him. Richie jumped, startled.
“I don’t think ‘Dirty Dennis’ has ever been spoken to like that in his life. I bet he peed his pants a little bit; I know I did!” Her sexy laugh tinkled right beside his ear; he could feel her warm breath on his sensitive neck.
Richie turned towards her and she slithered on top of him like a panther. “You sounded very sexy putting him in his place like that. A girl could get very turned on by a man capable of that, especially when his big hard cock is poking her between the legs!”
“What about a sexy mom, could she get turned on like that? Could she climb on top of her little boy and slip his peepee inside her? Could that ever happen?” Richie was enjoying this silly game.
And then it was happening, Jessica had pulled her cotton panties to the side and let her hot, wet pussy devour her son’s dick. She rode him like a prize stallion, sitting up straight, shedding the bedclothes, stretching her matronly body like a hibernating bear waking up in spring.
Richie just held on; he knew when he was outmatched. He was just a passenger now, an ecstatic, horny passenger to be fair, but he knew he was just along for the ride. Her breasts were locked away within the tight sports bra but that allowed him to take the road less travelled. He ran his hands over her thighs and bottom. He traced his fingertips over the warm, smooth skin of her ribs and felt the toned muscles and bones of her back move and stretch languidly as she screwed him. He explored her magnificent body and came to a realisation – she wasn’t a Rembrandt after all; she was a fucking Michelangelo!
His mother dropped her hands down on each side of his face, her long, loose hair falling around his head. He was cocooned inside the canlı bahis siteleri little bubble it made above his face. All he could see were her flashing eyes and her hungry lips; lips that were descending rapidly towards his own. His tortured balls cried for mercy as their lips met, it wasn’t fair, a perfect pussy, a perfect body and now a perfect kiss, how could he be expected to hold on under this pressure?
He couldn’t. He didn’t. He released his essence into her delectable body. He gave her the one true gift he still could, his love, his devotion. She accepted it gratefully, crouching down to ensure he could worm his way as far inside her as possible. She spoke softly, the tip of her nose touching his:
“Richie, baby. I thought this morning that my life had ended. All I could see in my future was jail, fear and separation – from you, from Maeby, from our baby. My brain shut down; I couldn’t cope with the terror of it all because it was my fault. It was my stupid plan and now I had ruined our lives; yours, mine, our baby’s and even your father’s.
“But you stood tall. Under the most intense pressure and stress imaginable, you kept your head. You made decisions, good decisions. You did the right things. You looked after me, you saved me. There’s a very primitive part of me that is linked to you now. It always was, because you’re my son, my baby boy. But you’re linked to me now as a man, as my man. The father of my child, my protector, my saviour.
“I shall do anything for you Richard MacFarlane, whatever you ask or demand, for as long as I live.”
“Sweet mom, could you start by rolling off me please? You’re crushing my left nut!”
“Oh baby, I’m sorry, let me kiss it better!” Jessica exclaimed, twisting her body so she could do just that.
“Hey, come here,” Richie said, pulling her back towards him, “it’s fine, I’ve had far worse falling asleep on the couch by myself! I just want you here, holding me, talking with me. That’s all I need.”
She snuggled in beside him, whispering apologies and words of love. They held each other, talking quietly about their new life and where it might lead. Talking about the future, about their new little family. Not once did she think of Dennis or the tawdry existence she’d left behind. Her new life began that day, she would only ever look forward from now on.
That evening Richie had gone to the shared kitchen on his floor and heated up half of the chicken and fries in the oven. Jess and he had enjoyed the oily, crunchy food. They were ravenous, neither had eaten since breakfast.
“I just remembered something,” Jessica said, “Dennis was talking about Maeby, he said she was moving to a firm here in Phoenix! Did you know anything about that?”
“Yeah, it was sorta, kinda my idea mom,” Richie admitted. “She hadn’t made any firm decisions when we left after Christmas, but I’d made her see that she held all the cards, she could call the shots. Any time we’ve talked on the phone since has been more about well, you know…”
“What do I know? That my slutty little sis is trying to steal my baby daddy? That blonde bimbo doesn’t stand a chance, you’re putty in my hands baby, aren’t you?” Jessica replied in her little, mommy voice, Richie found it a massive turn on.
“It didn’t feel like putty this afternoon,” he grumbled, “and anyway, she’s already admitted she’s my girlfriend, she looooves me,” he said.
“I’m only kidding baby,” Jess laughed, tweaking his nose. “She talked to me as much as you this week. She told me all about your pre-Christmas adventures. Truth or dare indeed and while she was in a meeting too. I wish I could be in a meeting, with you rooting around under my desk, that would be fun.”
Richie washed their plates and glasses in the little sink in the room. Looking over his shoulder at his mother he told her to strip.
“Ooh, I’m just too full baby, maybe later,” she protested, ripping a huge belch right after. She looked so startled that Richie dissolved into laughter, splashing the dishwater on his shirt. Mom had never done that before!
“No, I want to wash our clothes. I have all my stuff in the car but I don’t want to unpack. Maeby said she would arrange somewhere for us to stay. I can’t be apart from you now and we can’t remain here. I think there’s an old football jersey in the bottom drawer, it should be long enough to cover your modesty.
Jessica hunted around before pulling out a maroon and gold Sun Devils top. She calmly undressed, making sure Richie got a good look at her wobbling boobs before covering them up with the shirt, the name Daniels emblazoned across the back.
“Come on,” Richie said, gathering up their soiled clothes, “our washing machine is the most popular one in this wing. Let’s go before someone else starts using it.”
He ushered her out the door and they scampered along the corridor to the laundry room. Jess couldn’t believe how many of her own college memories came flooding back. Sneaking about with a sexy boy, it was too delicious.
The machine was free and Richie dumped their clothes in. He ran his student ID card over a scanner and the machine came to life. He popped in a Tide pod and chose a short, cool cycle.
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